how are you not curious?

On the premise that reality is a social construct and that reality is an illusion.

How does one not want to question everything?

How these systems that bind us socially and are intricately bound to us, exist and persist?

What are the mechanisms that make it so?

What is it that drives us to repeat the same mistakes not to learn from history?

Remember when you were little and what motivated you? The drive to just go play or seemed amazed at something for the first time or question after question about everything? Why do you assume it's true or correct? Do you remember the moment you stopped playing with toys as a child, what was it that made you go I no longer want to do this?  Do you feel like an adult? What is that? Why do languages work but don't work? What knowledge out there is useful, or useless? How does one determine that? How do we know?

There is this fine line between confidence and arrogance, which is apparently the "zen moment" you want, being able to confidently convey a topic with adequate knowledge and the ability to support and go in to ancillary topics of a same vein whilst knowing what words to avoid that might indicate your lack of knowledge.

I don't know or I lack the knowledge to have an opinion are sufficient and expected.

I feel both ignorant and confident.. confident in that I think I have enough of the bug picture to attempt to relay and point in the right side for references as well. In fact a majority of what piques my writing is from what I was reading. A good other is from experiences ATM in relation to either current reading or some long term thought I have been stewing on...