Overwhelmed

 Shoulders are heavy.. There's a stress there absolutely...

and i do find my self taking deep breaths more so often throughout the day...

I don't feel overwhelmed.. so I need to take a break before I get there... absolutely..

but I can't break break.. because i can't escape my mind.. so I take a break.. which I think I did.. but again.. I can't run from my mind..

I'm confronted with things.. things I don't know and things I know and i have to reconcile the two.. constantly.. 

this is why I'm tired.. even when I'm not thinking my brain is still trying to keep my reality pieced together , every new piece of information that conflicts with the current paradigm gets processed one way or another.. depending on what our education is and our experiences.. the foundational education/experiences coupled with our personality/psychological traits guide us one way or another on the path of humanity.

I've taking this silly test a number of times... and each time I take it it's a different personality... which leads me to believe that I have a cycle of personalities... I have this evolution tied to reality idea...

so for instance something either is or is not... and if it is then the properties and characteristics of it are theirs alone.. 1 is 1, not 2 or 3, you are you, there is no clone that you are aware of right?

so as we are in a closed system of reality, everything interacts with each other, that is. EVERYTHING is a part of the machine of life.. evolution.

As everything in existence is made up of matter, including thoughts. Sooooo if we are in a machine of sorts... driven by the rules of chaos/evolution... we know through science that to an extent we can effect the machine (climate change), why wouldn't we be able to guide it??

Though this would be a herculean effort... requiring an punctuated equilibrium type evolutionary moment in humanity that increased critical thinking skills to the masses, coupled with an education equal to 25 years... but I don't see that happening.

I break the world down to an evolutionary angle.. not just the biological.. social.. relationships.. personal growth.. 

my journey stops when I do.. and personal enrichment/introspection won't stop.. if life is about change then i have to be able to adapt to that change...

And I sit here knowing that I have to write all this down...

and I too tremble in fear and uncertainty as to how to do..when I know.. I know I know.. and I laugh at it.. as the tense giddyness I feel is still present.. I laugh with delight.. I laugh with fear.. I laugh with hope.. and I sigh at the hope.. the hope that I can have something worthwhile.. it's going to be a rough road ahead... but I know I know I know!!! Though I don't.. I know. It's about the journey...

 

I'm ignorant... but I have science to guide me along the way. Socrates would loathe & enjoy today, I but I get the impression he'd also long for that last drink as well. The sheer level of madness today and it goes unquestioned.

 

There was a Tweet I saw one time that also helped a bit to put this into perspective... 

Personalities type quizzes are a bit of today's Biorhythm/ Horoscope