Sunday, September 18, 2022

why do we bargain with those who hold us hostage and sell us out?

So... I'm about done with that history book I've been reading for over a year...

It's amazing to learn about how a possible reality feels like an illusion... Yet again.. humanity is locked in a program of predetermination. Fractals being a good basic... Lol basic... They are fucking weird... The close you get the more of the same..

Science is fucking amazing... I sorta get it.. I get enough to know the biggish picture... The science of evolution... The history of humanity... The cycles of everything that we are all attached to... Evolution.

We are a blip on this rock... In this galaxy.. universe.. reality.  Bittersweet at best.... Hell is a better descriptor.

The 2nd law of thermodynamics... Aka fun killer.

If there is a beginning... There is an end.

I know I have my social walls and "idiosyncrasies"... I'm trying not to be an asshole. 

I've been a bit more contemplaty lately... The phrase you are what you eat... How it's not just about food but what occupies your available time will produce same said product. Why am I obsessed with this information?? 

At times I feel like my brain is a breakdown away from oblivion. There's a governor... Restrictor plate... Blocker that seems to prevent me from putting shit together...

There have been a handful of ah ha moments in my life.... Ones where I not only got self confirmation but outside neutral confirmation. Pursuing education... Philosophy especially... That leads me further down a path of trying to maintain a sense of balance... I'm no longer drowning in my own ignorance.. 

It's harder to build... Than to destroy.
It's harder to love than to hate.

Idealistic

What the hell is this shit...

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