misplaced frustrations

 so I'm going to write a bit about what I think about the human condition in how humans seek out needs...

I've been reflecting on this for a bit, (should read up on behavioral studies) the idea on this aspect of our human existence. Namely how we as a species just kind of are at the whims of the forces around us and the choices we make after.

I have no patience for others who appear to be incapable or too far broken to want to make their lives better. Even though I can reflect on my own dysfunctional broken life and where I am.

Or is that it, my inability to accept this reality, that is the current living situation that I find myself in. I hate having to be dependent upon others... thanks Dad!

I know my understanding of the world and of things is not the same for others. That my "normal operating parameters" are different from others... none the less I struggle with accepting the dysfunctionality of others. That is what I perceive as others dysfunctions.

Again... I was there.

I was in a dire strait... I accepted an "off the cuff" offer to stay in Ca... Now I need to get the fuck out of here. I can't live in these same fucking conditions as when I grew up. A person who sits on their ass all day long and does nothing. Just like my mother did. I'm over this. 

 

When other's sloven habits impact me I get irritated. I try to make it a point to not be a burden, try to make sure that others have opportunity, equal access, etc...

 

I get it... I'm over it.